"I Will Play My Game Beneath the Spin Light," Brand New
Tim: I love dumpster diving.
Me: What'd you find?
Tim: A brand new iron. Black and Decker. And new headphones. Bose!
Me: They're probably broken.
Tim: (pause, after a few seconds, under his breath): These are broken. Yeah, these are crap. But I'm keeping the iron.
Me: Okay...
Tim: It's cordless. Come on.
5 minutes later...
Tim: Wait! The headphones do work!
10 minutes later...
Tim: I totally just dumpster dived more.
Me: What now?
Tim: Oh my god. I got a flashlight and an underwater camera. An underwater digital camera!
Me: Does it work?
Tim: I don't know!
Me: Where were those things?
Tim: Sitting next to the trash.
Me: Do you think our neighbors saw you?
Tim: I don't know. I don't care.
Tim: (under his breath, in realization): I need the power cord...oh! The cord might be out there! Alright, I gotta go back out. I'll be back....
10 minutes later...
Me: Did you find it?
Tim: Yup!
Me: Seriously?
Tim: Yes! It's the cord! Sweet!
Me: Cool. Do I still have to get you a bazooka for Christmas?
Tim: Yes.
Me: Why?
Tim: I'm cool. I deserve a bazooka.
Me: Maybe you should be kind of embarrassed.
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