First Time Was a Great Time, Second Time Was a Blast...

"The Right Stuff," New Kids on the Block


Last night Marisa and I went to the NKOTB show. It was outrageous. My top six favorite moments from the concert, in no particular order:

1) Joey yelling, "Holy shit!......That's right, I said 'Shit!'"

2) The revolving piano in the center of the arena that the boys all awkwardly and pathetically danced around, yet no one actually played.

3) Jordan Knight, wearing an unbuttoned white women's blouse, trying to be sexy while singing his solo "hit" song (circa 1995), "I Can Give it to You." During this number, Jordan's chest was slathered in a vaseline-like substance (fake sweat?), and there was a wind machine strategically placed to make his shirt billow seductively. Ridiculous and amazing.

4) Donnie Wahlberg (who, by the way, has been arrested a number of times, one of which I know was arson-related) trying entirely too hard to be the "bad-boy-gangsta-hardcore-rapper" of the group: He swore, wore entire ensembles bedazzled in what I can only assume he believed to be "bling," wore an oversized "Black Rock" shirt adorned with a HUGE marijuana leaf, and pretended to unzip and pull down his pants. Twice. Needless to say, he is now my favorite.

5) The fact that, on two different occasions, Danny and Jonathan didn't even grace the stage with their presence while Donnie, Joey, and Jordan sang. Now, everybody knows that those two are in the group solely to round out the number to 5, seeing as neither one of them contributes anything (vocals, dance moves, or otherwise). But really? For two songs they didn't even come out? At least Jonathan is cute...

6) There was not ONE SINGLE person in the ENTIRE audience-- NOT ONE-- that wasn't doing the dance and screaming along to "Hangin' Tough."

There were fans of all ages, although mostly women in their early-to-late 30's. There were women wearing old-school, tye-dye NKOTB t-shirts. There were women dressed so scandalously that I'm CERTAIN they were trying to go home with a New Kid. There were girls in the audience crying, pawing at Jordan, throwing their underwear on stage, and holding up signs saying, "Joey, the baby's yours!" In short, it was a chaotic fiasco. It was a debacle. It was immature, embarrassing, and shameful. And it was FANTASTIC. I'd go again in a heartbeat.